Three In A Bed
This week, Five’s sensational documentary strand gets acquainted with some of the most unusual relationships in Britain – threesomes.
There is a family in South Wales which is markedly different to most homes in the area. As well as four kids, two cats, a bulldog and five ferrets, there are three adults – John, Shanea and Noel. Shanea explains: “I love John. I love Noel. Noel loves me. John loves me.”
John and Shanea married in 1994 and had three children soon after. It was then that Shanea and John decided to have an open marriage, after which Shanea met Noel and fell in love with him. Shanea told husband John all about him and soon after, the two men met. Noel was surprised at how well he and John got on. “We had a drink and hit it off. It’s been like that ever since,” Noel explains. The vast majority of men would not have welcomed another man into their marriage, but John wasdifferent – even after Noel got Shanea pregnant. Soon after, Noel and the new arrival Mercy moved into the family home for good. But how does John really feel about sharing his wife with Noel? “He makes her happy,” he says. “Anyone who makes her happy isn’t all that bad.”
Although their lives sound like a bohemian erotic fantasy, the reality is far more humdrum. With four kids to bring up, their lives are hectic and the
couples have sparse opportunity to spend ‘quality time’ together. The trio sleep in the same bed, but Noel and John are both heterosexual – the threesome’s first and last drunken experiment together ended in disaster. “It’s not something either of the lads felt comfortable with,” says Shanea. However, she seems perfectly happy with their unorthodox sleeping arrangements. “I love it when they both fall asleep on me,” she enthuses. “I feel so totally at peace.”
The threesome function as a family quite happily, with their older kids fully aware of the situation. As for toddler Mercy, Shanea says: “She refers to John as Dad and Noel as Daddy. That’s the way it will stay.” The threesome are well aware that their setup is far from regular, and that compared to their peers, their kids have a unusual homelife. They feel,
however, that their children are blessed with more love and support than most families are able to offer.
Far away from the provincial environs of the Welsh valleys, another threesome are putting the ‘swinging’ back into London. Twentysomething Aussie librarian Davina married Dean, but on the discovery that she was bisexual, invited fellow librarian Jen into their marriage. And unlike Noel, John and Shanea, this threesome do a lot more than just sleep in their shared bed. All three profess to be having a wonderful time, without any jealousy or insecurity. “I feel we all love each other the same amount and in the same way, so there’s nothing to be jealous about,” says Dean. And how does he feel when the girls exclude him from certain activities? “I get to watch,” smiles Dean. Although life is sweet at the moment for Dean and his two girls, how will his mother feel when she finds out about her son’s triangular love life? Watch as he makes the call home...
Also in tonight’s programme, we see the darker side of threesomes, and meet married couple Sarah and Ben from Southampton, whose marriage did not survive polyamory...